Lonely days in Sunny Cali (yeah it's still Sunny like 60 yesterday)

Psalm 102
A prayer of an afflicted man. When he is faint and pours out his lament before the LORD.
1 Hear my prayer, O LORD; let my cry for help come to you.
2 Do not hide your face from me when I am in distress. Turn your ear to me; when I call, answer me quickly.
3 For my days vanish like smoke; my bones burn like glowing embers.
4 My heart is blighted and withered like grass; I forget to eat my food.
5 Because of my loud groaning I am reduced to skin and bones.
6 I am like a desert owl, like an owl among the ruins.
7 I lie awake; I have become like a bird alone on a roof.
8 All day long my enemies taunt me; those who rail against me use my name as a curse.
9 For I eat ashes as my food and mingle my drink with tears
10 because of your great wrath, for you have taken me up and thrown me aside.
11 My days are like the evening shadow; I wither away like grass.
12 But you, O LORD, sit enthroned forever; your renown endures through all generations. ... it goes on to talk about God's greatness and infinetness...

I guess I have felt alone ever since Rachel went away to the airforce on September 1, 2004 but you never really think about those things until you are down or so alone that all you can do is think. Sure, I've been happy, I've had friends and fun but everything has been so temporary. It's not that I feel unloved (well I guess sometimes I do) or ungrateful or anything, it's just a lot of times even when I have everyone around me that loves me, I feel like no one gets me. I think for the first time in a long time, my BA girls REALLY got me. I was able to express my crazy side and my Christian side. My "desires of the flesh" and desires to be a true woman of God. So even though my stupid boyfriend was too lazy to understand me and care about me, I was not alone at all. I was more surrounded by good people and God than I think ever in my life. Anyway, now I'm home and like I said before, that was all temporary. Not even my mother understands me. I don't want to talk about anything. I don't want to talk about Ryan because all she says is, "well he wasn't right for you. i'm glad you two broke up, and you didn't do anything you regret..." and I don't want to talk about how much I don't want to be here and I dread going back to school. It's so weird. My mom used to be one of my best friends.
Enough blabbering! So last night, I looked up "alone" in this GIANT Bible concordance thing my church gave me for graduation, and among other verses, Psalm 102:7 came up. "I am like a sparrow alone on a roof..." I read the whole chapter over and over, and I prayed out loud the verses. And I just started crying. I was like telling God that I just felt so alone, and for no reason at all, I stopped praying and I heard, "I am with you, you are not alone." And my whole body went numb and I just started balling. Tears of I don't know what! But there I was, being REAL with Jesus. "Hear my crys!"